It has been my observation that most managers and leaders fail to use performance conversations well. It is one of the most underutilized opportunities at a manager’s disposal. I’m not referring just to the ‘annual’ conversation, but to the numerous opportunities we have to give our people information about how they are doing. It is one of the chief ways that we tell our staff in specific ways how we support and value them.
Unfortunately, for many, it is often viewed with ‘dread.’ Managers see it as ‘something I have to do,’ while staff can see it as a waste of time because they don’t receive truly honest and useful information. Perhaps that is because neither party understands about the purpose and the promise.
Rather than call them performance reviews I prefer to view them as another form of feedback, a ‘dialog of information’ about what has gone well, where the opportunities for growth/change are, and where I, as your manager, can help. It is a dialog of commitment to the success of the two of us, although it is mostly discussing the associate.
The disconnect comes in a couple of ways. First, we need to understand that 82% of the population has some degree of difficulty with conflict or confrontation. Second, many managers have received little or no formal training in how to best conduct the performance dialog.
With so many people struggling with conflict/confrontation it is easy to see why so many people want to avoid it. If leaders are untrained they will likely see the performance review as confrontation. This very often leads to non-direct and unclear communication with the ‘difficult’ parts of the review. We think that we have communicated what we were supposed to, yet often the employee walks away trying to figure out what he/she was just told. There is likely to be more tension between the manager and employee.
When we are unclear we are unsure, and when we are unsure we very often do not perform at the level we are capable. We either enhance our relationship with our employees based on how the review is conducted (i.e., timeliness, balanced, useful information, etc.), or we don’t. It is easy to see how performance problems are compounded by how we approach the performance discussion.
One of the keys to a good performance discussion is in the relationship. If we are able to establish a good working relationship (supportive, directive, encouraging, respectful) then we can likely think about the information we need to share as being just that…information. It has nothing to do with “being liked, being loved.” It has everything to do with you helping the employee to fit into the team, being clear about their role and what the expectations are, being supportive (teaching, coaching, correcting, encouraging) and expressing how we value them as a member of the team when it is warranted. We are not responsible for motivating them, but we are responsible for creating the environment that fosters motivation.
Performance ‘conversations’ are coaching moments where we exchange information –viewing even the difficult messages as an essential part of that information. If we can learn to conduct these conversations as vital pieces of information that the employee needs to be successful, then reviews have the chance to be less of a corporate ‘hair ball’ and more of what is intended…an exchange of information for everyone’s success.